I once was a critic but now I’m found… humbled. (confession time)

A pint for whoever gets the nudge in the title…huzzah!

So as all my previous posts indicate I’ve been going through a time in my life where I was verry condemning of christian culture. I’m fed up with sunday morning services and all the programs and formulas that come with it. I’m bored with preachings and teachings that make you just sit there instead of actually doing something with it. And for the love of a donut!!!! I can’t hear another worship song without plugging my fingers into my ears going obnoxiously “lalalalala” like a little kid who doesn’t wanna hear. Those just drive me up the wall!

I guess you can say I got bitter about things, between having my entire life and ambitions taking weird detours and getting rejected by christian women time and time again in the most painfull ways. Something just snapped in me allong the way that made me say “no more”.

No more sitting through music that I loathe trying to put up a smile and tap my foot allong just for the heck of it. No more trying to find a wife in this select group of people where all the single women give me the cold shoulder (knowing full well that women outside sometimes practically throw themselves at me…on that odd lucky day so to speak). No more trying to hide away my honest questions, perceptions and diffirent personality.

And while most of these things are honest and genuine on my behalf I have to admit one thing. I underestimated some people.

Not long aggo I decided to pop my head back in the door a couple of times to sort of say hi and goodbye since soon I’ll be moving (don’t know where yet) other times it was out of neccesity. And a few times in a row now I’ve had people approach me honestly to ask me how I’m doing and what’s going on in my life. And they’ve given me what I wanted, a listening ear that doesn’t condem, that doesn’t argue, that doesn’t tell me what to do or what to believe in which way.

For that I take my hat off to the whole local scene. Christ lives in these people and is best expressed one on one over a pint at the bar, sitting in a living room with a cup of tea, exchanging contact information just to hang out sometime without any plans or programs.

Is this my return to the “every sunday morning without missing a beat” lifestyle? Absolutly not. It’s not me and it probably never will be. I will however look for fellowship in those places where it matters, where it becomes personal and real, to me atleast.

It took some of these sunday morning folks (or that’s how I caracturised them) to show me how. The same people I liked to point fingers at collectively.

And so I say, Namasté. Which I’ve been told means something allong the lines of “I bow before that which is greater in you then I am”…don’t quote me on that one exactly. But for the sake of irony while writing a blog on christianity I’d like to add a little eastern flavor :p

 

Namasté, may I have learned a little more, to judge a little less.

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